Dear Church,

 

This note is making its way to you as I wrap up an overnight in New Hampshire for the UU Minister’s Association Northern New England Chapter spring “retreat” – this year a workshop on boundaries and self-differentiated leadership. And time, too, to connect with colleagues serving in Maine, New Hampshire, and Vermont to swap ideas, share stories, and support one another. 

 

I am always grateful for the refresher on ministerial boundaries, as it reminds me one of the best ways we can love and care for one another in community is by being clear with one another. Boundaries build trust and safety. A self differentiated leader is one who maintains their own identity, feelings, and perspectives while still maintaining deep connections and relationships with others. It is hard work to lead from this place, and sometimes the more we care the harder it is. One of the gifts of congregational life, which I named this past Sunday, is the way we can use it as a practice ground for the rest of our lives. How might you practice loving boundaries and self-differentiation here in our beloved community to make them easier to live out in your life beyond the walls of the congregation? Is there an aspect of self-differentiated leadership–being separate but still connected–that you might want to lean into at home or at work? I’ll be practicing this and am always glad to have companions in lifelong learning. 

 

I will be out of the pulpit this weekend and our service will be led by the Worship Committee– a thoughtful exploration of the nature of life. Queer Community Conversations will follow at 11:30. Then I’ll be back for a really special service on April 26th– a service I’ll lead alongside five of my multi-faith colleagues who organized together during the ICE surge in January. Lifelong learning, indeed. 

 

Until I see you, take good care and enjoy the spring temperatures! 

 

In faith,

Rev. Tara